That's true.. and I guess that might be part of what I'm having trouble accepting, that maybe to grow up is to become somewhat jaded and lose a lot of our romantic notions. (hi, run on sentence)It's a strange state. I'm sad that I've lost my "innocence" as it were, but also find that I tend to be happier this way.
That's true.. and I guess that might be part of what I'm having trouble accepting, that maybe to grow up is to become somewhat jaded and lose a lot of our romantic notions. (hi, run on sentence)It's a strange state. I'm sad that I've lost my "innocence" as it were, but also find that I tend to be happier this way.
Love...marriage...child...divorce...dating...I've gone the cycle completely through losing my romantic notions & now starting to regain them. Some of them have value...but, an absolute tie between sex & love doesn't seem to be one.Mind you...the first time a woman cried happy tears in my arms after making love...that was a magical moment.
Love...marriage...child...divorce...dating...I've gone the cycle completely through losing my romantic notions & now starting to regain them. Some of them have value...but, an absolute tie between sex & love doesn't seem to be one.Mind you...the first time a woman cried happy tears in my arms after making love...that was a magical moment.
I guess it all depends... most of all our basic morals come from religion, but enforced more from the victorian age, and even though times have change it's still bascially the same.. it all depends.. but on the other hand.. it depends how you mean it.. because even married couple in love, know when to fuck and make love and have it be different, from just sex love and lustbeing that said.. I have no idea what I just said.. I am just so horny now.. hehe
I dont believe so, sex doesnt necessarily have anything to do with love. Sex can be just what it is, animalistic lust. Love doesnt hurt the process, but sex doesnt need love to exist. I dont believe it lowers your morals at all!by the way, please add me as a friend. I have added you!
It depends on who you ask. That's a question similar to "if I laugh when someone falls down the stairs, am I of low character?". It has a lot to do with background, personal beliefs, age, one's personal situation, and sexual experience. A traditionalist would call your separation between carnality and love sinful, or at least immoral, because the traditional belief of the 20th century is that love legitimizes sex.I'd call it mature, though. Being able to disseminate and categorize your emotions, relationships, and sexual identities, especially as a woman living in America, is something to be proud of.
No... as long as you still love sex, then all is well.I've had sex with people I wasn't necessarily (read: even remotely) in love with, and there were people I loved that I didn't have sex with.But, at the end of the day, I still love sex.
So I might be jumping to conclusions here.. but do you think that now when you have sex WITH love it makes it that much sweeter, having been through/understood sex exclusive of love? I think that's what I'm trying to ask in that statement.
I get what you said - that our sense of morals has it's root in our religions and was reinforced by the Victorian era, and the concept of "proper" morals hasn't changed all that much from that time?I was thinking not in terms of regular partners making love/fucking, but more along the lines of being able to have casual sex without a relationship.
So as a Victorian Catholic(or were they Anglican?) archetype, I've failed horribly, yet succeeded at being a modern woman. Two sides of the same coin, I suppose.Although, if you want to get uber-technical and split some hairs, love isn't what legitimizes sex, procreation is what legitimizes sex. I think I'm having some kind of epiphany here - on a very fundamental level, the concept of our morals being related to having sex with love is a strictly human, societal(?)romanticized creation, and that to be truly "moral", you would only have sex with the purpose of begetting a child. So it would follow that even to have sex "with" love present is still immoral if you have no intention of procreating, thus negating the whole inner struggle for moral high ground on my part. Meaning, that even if you love your partner and have sex, you're no more moral than I am if you're just "practicing", as it were. Whew. Tell me whatcha think.
So as a Victorian Catholic(or were they Anglican?) archetype, I've failed horribly, yet succeeded at being a modern woman. Two sides of the same coin, I suppose.Although, if you want to get uber-technical and split some hairs, love isn't what legitimizes sex, procreation is what legitimizes sex. I think I'm having some kind of epiphany here - on a very fundamental level, the concept of our morals being related to having sex with love is a strictly human, societal(?)romanticized creation, and that to be truly "moral", you would only have sex with the purpose of begetting a child. So it would follow that even to have sex "with" love present is still immoral if you have no intention of procreating, thus negating the whole inner struggle for moral high ground on my part. Meaning, that even if you love your partner and have sex, you're no more moral than I am if you're just "practicing", as it were. Whew. Tell me whatcha think.
I don't doubt that sex doesn't need love to exist, or vice versa, but what I'm concerned with is a personal change, wherein I'm finding myself able to have casual sex, which is something I was never able to do before. I'd *thought* I was having casual sex, but it was usually with friends, and technically, I love my friends as much as my boyfriends, just in different ways. However, recently I've been able to have sex with people I have no sort of relationship with, just hey, I like you, let's fuck, and I'm curious as to how I arrived at this mental state. After reading some of the other comments I'm not entirely sure that a change in morals is a lowering of morals anymore, and I think that's pretty neat.Heh. Was that too much info?Either way, I've added you back :)
Of course I still love sex, and sometimes I feel like that might be part of the problem. I don't know fi you've read this post in my other journal, but what I'm feeling has a lot to do with trying to separate, or merge religion with my life. Sadly, it's not working too well. But on a less serious note, sex rules ;)But you knew that already!
well that all depends.. hehe.. if that is what you want to do and you enjoy it.. then your moral about sex, is different, though I would try it if i had to chance, but me still being a virgin, I just rather think and daydream about it, then deal with drama.. but that has no bearing on your ethics of code of other things..
It wasn't more a question of what I enjoyed, but rather, more a question about umm, whether or not the two go hand in hand. Sex doesn't necessarily include drama, you know ;)Aside from that however, I think I have pretty good morals and ethics.
Unless you go back into the days, two or three hundred years ago, when a man penetrated his wife through a hole in a sheet while praying right up til ejaculation, I don't think that the purpose of sex is procreation anywhere in society. In fact, in our modern society, I think that the concept of monogamy is reinforced by fear of disease more so than any character-based flaws that promiscuity might entail. I should have more to say about this, but I'm so goddamned tired that I'm worthless. Let me know if this answered your question.
Are we talking about morals or ethics? I personally see the two as being very different myself...But to separate the two to me says you are growing as a person, nothing more, nothing less. And that's a good thing because I believe that if one stops learning, ie growing, one might as well curl up and die.On a more personal note, I prefer at least being friends with whoever I'm fucking, it tends to make the fucking better. I wholeheartedly agree that making love is vastly more satisfying than having sex as well. Not that there's anything wrong with random sex, as long as you are safe about it ;)
well, that's kinda what I was getting at, but not really... well, maybe.The point I was making.. On the most basic of basic levels, sex was created solely for the purpose of procreation. Any morals attached beyond that purpose are strictly the fancies of society at large, although disease does sort of put a new spin on that. However, lets for a second take a giant eraser and swipe STDs off the board, and we're back to where I started. So from a very pure sense, and I'm talking in a completely hypothetical world, anyone having sex for pleasure as opposed to procreation is being immoral. You're completely correct however, in the sense that sex evolved way beyond procreation AGES ago, but I don't think fear of disease is a defining factor in most monogamous relationships. but yeah. I think I just went cross eyed, I'm so tired and sick.. We'll have to do this at an earlier time =)
This http://www.paulgraham.com/say.html is well written and has a lot of relevant info on beliefs that are not actually "true", they're just societal conventions. Good stuff. The short answer is society is fucked up around sex. But we knew that.
see, that's where it's strange for me. For a long time, the two were hand in hand, I couldn't have sex without being in a wholehearted relationship. That's why it's so odd that all of a sudden, it's the opposite. I don't know.
I obviously am going to the wrong doctors.. I wonder where the best place to get that perscription filled would be.. I'd think CVS might have a hard time..
67 comments:
I think that's part of growing up. We have romantic notions about the two being inextricably linked when we are young.
its never bad thing to see the world in a differnt light.. it might bother some people but not me ;o)
That's true.. and I guess that might be part of what I'm having trouble accepting, that maybe to grow up is to become somewhat jaded and lose a lot of our romantic notions. (hi, run on sentence)It's a strange state. I'm sad that I've lost my "innocence" as it were, but also find that I tend to be happier this way.
That's true.. and I guess that might be part of what I'm having trouble accepting, that maybe to grow up is to become somewhat jaded and lose a lot of our romantic notions. (hi, run on sentence)It's a strange state. I'm sad that I've lost my "innocence" as it were, but also find that I tend to be happier this way.
Love...marriage...child...divorce...dating...I've gone the cycle completely through losing my romantic notions & now starting to regain them. Some of them have value...but, an absolute tie between sex & love doesn't seem to be one.Mind you...the first time a woman cried happy tears in my arms after making love...that was a magical moment.
Love...marriage...child...divorce...dating...I've gone the cycle completely through losing my romantic notions & now starting to regain them. Some of them have value...but, an absolute tie between sex & love doesn't seem to be one.Mind you...the first time a woman cried happy tears in my arms after making love...that was a magical moment.
change in morals doesn't mean a decline in morals. change is just different, that's all.
very good point.. i hadn't thought of it like that
I guess it all depends... most of all our basic morals come from religion, but enforced more from the victorian age, and even though times have change it's still bascially the same.. it all depends.. but on the other hand.. it depends how you mean it.. because even married couple in love, know when to fuck and make love and have it be different, from just sex love and lustbeing that said.. I have no idea what I just said.. I am just so horny now.. hehe
I dont believe so, sex doesnt necessarily have anything to do with love. Sex can be just what it is, animalistic lust. Love doesnt hurt the process, but sex doesnt need love to exist. I dont believe it lowers your morals at all!by the way, please add me as a friend. I have added you!
i would sooooo offer myself up to your demands but i am 2200 miles away..... damn i really need to learn to teleport like on startrack or something
It depends on who you ask. That's a question similar to "if I laugh when someone falls down the stairs, am I of low character?". It has a lot to do with background, personal beliefs, age, one's personal situation, and sexual experience. A traditionalist would call your separation between carnality and love sinful, or at least immoral, because the traditional belief of the 20th century is that love legitimizes sex.I'd call it mature, though. Being able to disseminate and categorize your emotions, relationships, and sexual identities, especially as a woman living in America, is something to be proud of.
No... as long as you still love sex, then all is well.I've had sex with people I wasn't necessarily (read: even remotely) in love with, and there were people I loved that I didn't have sex with.But, at the end of the day, I still love sex.
So I might be jumping to conclusions here.. but do you think that now when you have sex WITH love it makes it that much sweeter, having been through/understood sex exclusive of love? I think that's what I'm trying to ask in that statement.
I get what you said - that our sense of morals has it's root in our religions and was reinforced by the Victorian era, and the concept of "proper" morals hasn't changed all that much from that time?I was thinking not in terms of regular partners making love/fucking, but more along the lines of being able to have casual sex without a relationship.
Yeah, sex with love is the best of the best. There's a connectedness, a sense that _this_ act is an extension of that emotional closeness.
So as a Victorian Catholic(or were they Anglican?) archetype, I've failed horribly, yet succeeded at being a modern woman. Two sides of the same coin, I suppose.Although, if you want to get uber-technical and split some hairs, love isn't what legitimizes sex, procreation is what legitimizes sex. I think I'm having some kind of epiphany here - on a very fundamental level, the concept of our morals being related to having sex with love is a strictly human, societal(?)romanticized creation, and that to be truly "moral", you would only have sex with the purpose of begetting a child. So it would follow that even to have sex "with" love present is still immoral if you have no intention of procreating, thus negating the whole inner struggle for moral high ground on my part. Meaning, that even if you love your partner and have sex, you're no more moral than I am if you're just "practicing", as it were. Whew. Tell me whatcha think.
So as a Victorian Catholic(or were they Anglican?) archetype, I've failed horribly, yet succeeded at being a modern woman. Two sides of the same coin, I suppose.Although, if you want to get uber-technical and split some hairs, love isn't what legitimizes sex, procreation is what legitimizes sex. I think I'm having some kind of epiphany here - on a very fundamental level, the concept of our morals being related to having sex with love is a strictly human, societal(?)romanticized creation, and that to be truly "moral", you would only have sex with the purpose of begetting a child. So it would follow that even to have sex "with" love present is still immoral if you have no intention of procreating, thus negating the whole inner struggle for moral high ground on my part. Meaning, that even if you love your partner and have sex, you're no more moral than I am if you're just "practicing", as it were. Whew. Tell me whatcha think.
I don't doubt that sex doesn't need love to exist, or vice versa, but what I'm concerned with is a personal change, wherein I'm finding myself able to have casual sex, which is something I was never able to do before. I'd *thought* I was having casual sex, but it was usually with friends, and technically, I love my friends as much as my boyfriends, just in different ways. However, recently I've been able to have sex with people I have no sort of relationship with, just hey, I like you, let's fuck, and I'm curious as to how I arrived at this mental state. After reading some of the other comments I'm not entirely sure that a change in morals is a lowering of morals anymore, and I think that's pretty neat.Heh. Was that too much info?Either way, I've added you back :)
Of course I still love sex, and sometimes I feel like that might be part of the problem. I don't know fi you've read this post in my other journal, but what I'm feeling has a lot to do with trying to separate, or merge religion with my life. Sadly, it's not working too well. But on a less serious note, sex rules ;)But you knew that already!
That's true.. although sometimes, it's hard to accept that the light has changed ;)
Its all good. I like you, wanna fuck?
heh. if I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me? ;)
email me, I want to play babe!tlegeza16@hotmail.com
well that all depends.. hehe.. if that is what you want to do and you enjoy it.. then your moral about sex, is different, though I would try it if i had to chance, but me still being a virgin, I just rather think and daydream about it, then deal with drama.. but that has no bearing on your ethics of code of other things..
It wasn't more a question of what I enjoyed, but rather, more a question about umm, whether or not the two go hand in hand. Sex doesn't necessarily include drama, you know ;)Aside from that however, I think I have pretty good morals and ethics.
Hmmmm....Wish I could assist you!!
lol have some time for flirting on yahoo?
...a human being with needs...both emotional and physical. They WILL merge...be patient...and enjoy yourself until then!
then that is all that matters :)
nope just means youre an adult... thats why they have 2 words for it cus its seperate stuff:)
Unless you go back into the days, two or three hundred years ago, when a man penetrated his wife through a hole in a sheet while praying right up til ejaculation, I don't think that the purpose of sex is procreation anywhere in society. In fact, in our modern society, I think that the concept of monogamy is reinforced by fear of disease more so than any character-based flaws that promiscuity might entail. I should have more to say about this, but I'm so goddamned tired that I'm worthless. Let me know if this answered your question.
Are we talking about morals or ethics? I personally see the two as being very different myself...But to separate the two to me says you are growing as a person, nothing more, nothing less. And that's a good thing because I believe that if one stops learning, ie growing, one might as well curl up and die.On a more personal note, I prefer at least being friends with whoever I'm fucking, it tends to make the fucking better. I wholeheartedly agree that making love is vastly more satisfying than having sex as well. Not that there's anything wrong with random sex, as long as you are safe about it ;)
well, that's kinda what I was getting at, but not really... well, maybe.The point I was making.. On the most basic of basic levels, sex was created solely for the purpose of procreation. Any morals attached beyond that purpose are strictly the fancies of society at large, although disease does sort of put a new spin on that. However, lets for a second take a giant eraser and swipe STDs off the board, and we're back to where I started. So from a very pure sense, and I'm talking in a completely hypothetical world, anyone having sex for pleasure as opposed to procreation is being immoral. You're completely correct however, in the sense that sex evolved way beyond procreation AGES ago, but I don't think fear of disease is a defining factor in most monogamous relationships. but yeah. I think I just went cross eyed, I'm so tired and sick.. We'll have to do this at an earlier time =)
woohoo
awww, the doctor can't find any patients. lol*points and laughs* =P
no it means you are thinking more like most males Chris :D
I personally think that's a mathematically required concept for a happy relationship. Someday I'll commit my theorum to paper.
This http://www.paulgraham.com/say.html is well written and has a lot of relevant info on beliefs that are not actually "true", they're just societal conventions. Good stuff. The short answer is society is fucked up around sex. But we knew that.
Absolutely Not!!! It's definitely a part of maturing. Separating the two is needed!
see, that's where it's strange for me. For a long time, the two were hand in hand, I couldn't have sex without being in a wholehearted relationship. That's why it's so odd that all of a sudden, it's the opposite. I don't know.
heh. Don't even get me started on double standards ;)
yeah, me and my broke ass practice with no patients ;)no laughing at me! ::stamps feet and pouts::
Ha,can I show off me parts in here?
that's what my doctor told me too.
Made sense to me, and I think it's a valid point.Sex for one and all, I suppose. Hooray!
Demand me to give you a nice hard fucking doctor!! I would so listen to your demands!!
Aww. Isn't that cute.
it sure is ;)now on your knees and worship ;)
do you even have to ask?I love parts ;)
do you even have to ask?I love parts ;)
heh, don't do me any favors ;)
seems to be going around these days... go figure..
give me two and uh... call me in the morning
look for me tonight, I should be on for a bit.. whats your sn?
you know, moe than once I've wished for the ability to teleport myself, or at least Mr. Scotty hanging around to do it for me.
wanna be my nurse? ;)
well since i cant teleport i will just screw you in my mind!!!!!
hmm, same hmo apparently. wonder why they don't share our information?
and if you're on yahoo, please do come find me too (brianmk24)
i am on during the day but not really very much at night.. you can get me at xxtekkiboyxx just add me tonight and i will catch you another time.
I have thrown the offer many a time.Maybe you'll take me up on it.
hey mebbe when i goto Ny at the end of the month ill look ya up!*wink*Revo
I obviously am going to the wrong doctors.. I wonder where the best place to get that perscription filled would be.. I'd think CVS might have a hard time..
if i'm not supposed to do you any favors? what shall i do then? ;)
I'd be whatever you want me to be....
Really?!Well thats intresting.Since you sounds like a Corvette made a sex drive.I thought I'd ask ,before I did.Ill post int a bit.
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